Beginner BDSM Basics 101

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Beginner BDSM Basics 101

bdsm basics

Conventional sex is pleasurable and all. There’s a wide variety of sex positions you can try that can give you and your partner extreme orgasm. But with all the hype about BDSM, thanks to our ‘Fifty Shades’ hero, it’s the women who are now seeking a little pain for pleasure.

If you’re not doing it yet, frankly you are missing out a lot. So if you and your partner are ready to take it to the next level – and by next level we mean kinky, erotic sex – here are some BDSM basics you can begin with.

 

 

  1. Prepare the ambiance.

Like any other BDSM basics will tell you, preparing the ambiance is a must. It’s the first step to setting the mood when you play your dominant and/or submissive role. Remember that when you do BDSM, you are not quite your actual selves. It’s more of role playing, thus the farther from reality you can be, the better.

 

  1. Dress for your role.

Dressing your role is another basic that you should remember. For most couples, the role they choose to play on every BDSM session is almost always the turn on. When you enter your “play” room, you should internalize your character and portray it well. This can set the mood and make the BDSM even more exciting and erotic.

 

  1. Choose a safe word.

Since BDSM is in all actuality more on dominance and submission, painful and harmful acts are inevitable. It’s what makes the act even more dramatic and interesting. Yet, you would not want to put yourself or your partner in real harm’s way. Thus, you should create a safe word.

A safe word is a phrase or single word that you and your partner agree on to speak if one reaches their limit for pain or harmful acts. This is mostly for the part of the submissive. You might want to avoid the use of “stop” or “don’t” as the pleasure may very well prompt them to say stop when they don’t really mean it.

 

  1. Prepare your “toys”…

Toys are your assistant into playing your character. Adult toys such as clamps, vibrators, ropes, gags and whips are among the BDSM basics that you should have in handy before you venture into the world of S and M. Toys can also make or break the satisfaction so make sure you choose the ones that can give intense pleasure.

 

  1. …Or forget the toys.

You can also choose to forego with toys if you don’t have any of them lying around. BDSM can still be played even without toys since dominance and submission can be done through commands and obedience of you both. It can be as simple as commanding your partner to perform a sexual favor, or there can be spanking, biting or scratching too.

 

You know what they say – once you go BDSM, you never go back (or something like that). Say goodbye to boring, vanilla sex and start working on these BDSM basics to hype up your bedroom escapades.

 

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Got any other BDSM Basics to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below

 

Jovarie Saplad
Jovarie Saplad

I’m a living paradox. An old soul trapped in a modern world. I’m a mother, a good sister and a writer in that order.

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